behavioural problems
December 26th, 2005Christmas day at our grandmothers: Everyone is very quiet except for me and Kaisa; we seem to fill the air and sofa space and say the wrong things. Everytime I laugh it’s too loud but it makes me want to laugh even more. I was much better at containing myself before.
Kaisa cries at the funeral of four weddings. I wonder how in movies it’s heroic to tell how you feel. New life motto: what would amèlie do? Only I think of it when she’s picking locks and reprogramming the phone. My mother looks suffering everytime my grandmother opens her mouth. Some things get passed down through generations.
It’s a better christmas than in many years, but in the end I really want to go home.
p.s. My most sincere apologies to the person sitting beside me at Narnia. I am so sorry I laughed, but I just couldn’t help it. It was the lion and the sun. The lion in general. And then the fight. And the other stuff. Oh, come on, it was funny.
beautiful: this is ocean