tea
August 25th, 2005
“I am no one’s little muskrat.” Ameliè said.
I watched the movie half sleeping. It started to feel like autumn but maybe that was the carrot soup I was making. Evenings are becoming ones that crave tea drinking, sitting in the kitchen drawing, reading, (dreaming). All life slows down and you are supposed to wrap yourself in things that make you happy and cozy and warm. The backyard of our building is made for sneaking out on a cigarette late at night. Watch all the windows lit up in silence. The boy who lives on the second floor washes dishes. All the other curtains are closed.
“Why are they all blue,” I cried after another page in my scrapbook. “It just seems like your heart is very broken,” Kaisa said. So then I made a yellow page. It’s a funny feeling, planning a new life and laying down roots at the same time.